Saturday, August 25, 2007

not to scare you...

...but to prepare you.

I've finally put into words the difference between raising teenage sons and raising teenage daughters. Don't worry. it seems not every teen feels the need to rage against the mother, and even with the worst (for me so far), they eventually grow out of it.

Once hormones set in it can be like this:

When your son gets mad he will pick up the emotional equivalent of a sofa and hurl it at you with all his might. No biggie. It's cumbersome and his aim is bad. You calmly step out of the way as he misses you completely. And he's over it.

When your daughter needs to vent her overwhelming emotions she dips a silver arrow in the most perfect poison prepared for you personally then pulls back her bow and shoots the arrow directly into your mother heart. She hits you dead center every time.

The trick will be to develop an immunity to every poison known to teengirlkind. Then you should be able to walk away from that one, too. I'm still working on it. I'll let you know.

(Is this a little too much information? If my frankness makes anyone uncomfortable let me know. I can keep it to myself.)


~j. said...

Does it all start with her asking if she can wear a bra? Or is that a different kind of arrow?

Queen Scarlett said...

Scared of...but dazzled by the imagery.

compulsive writer said...

j~ I think you're already getting off to a better start than I did. At least your daughter is comfortable enough with you she will say the word "bra." L~ stil calls it a "sock" or a "you know." This despite my best efforts to be open and frank and use appropriate terms. Wait till I someday tell you about what happens when your daughter refuses to discuss with you feminine hygiene.


Kathy's Korner said...

You visual is scary!! But don't stop....I'm using it to gear up and be prepared as I am the Mother of 3 girls.

AzĂșcar said...

Does it make you feel better if I tell you that I did a french manicure on my mom's nails last night as we sat and chatted? Then my sister read my blog entry about how my mom was ruining my life and we laughed.

compulsive writer said...

Yes. Thank you. There will be light at the end of the long dark tunnel.

I hope it makes all of you feel better to know it's not like this with every child. I sat around a breakfast table full of moms on the first day of school and amongst us there were only two of us with cases of bad chemistry with their daughters. And the other one has two daughters, but only one with bad chemistry.

So odds are good it won't be this bad for you. It's just really hard if you're the mom with the difficult relationship to resist thinking it's because you are a bad mother. You know?

Johnna said...

My son is 8, my girls are older. I wonder sometime what I'm getting into.

I could couch dodge. That sounds really good on some girl days.